Phenomenally 40

In 2017 I challenged myself to write 52 posts in 52 weeks and I failed. Not miserably, but still, I failed. I'm okay with that failure. While I did write way more posts than I had in previous years, I realized that the challenge was just another thing I wanted to cross off my list. It wasn't about personal growth or anything, just me and my addiction to crossing things off a list to say it was done. Failing worked out great for me because it forced me to reflect on my desire to stay busy. This year, I'm over it. Which explains why this is only my 3rd post of 2018. Black history month and Women's history month kept me busy with workshops and performances. When it was all done, I was left a horrible head cold, because I was doing too much. So I stopped. Sure I had to get knocked on my ass in order to do so, but once I stopped, I decided to commit to working smarter not harder.
I began this blog as a sort of online journal (without the juicy stuff)  and if it inspired someone else, cool. But then my objective changed and I wanted to increase my readers, so I decided to write more often, which meant that writing posts became a job ( a job I don't get paid for as of yet). And for what? Not as an outlet for myself or to help others, but just to write 52 posts. Don't get me wrong, each post was authentic and from the heart, but when I posted, instead of feeling relieved to have purged my thoughts, or possibly help others, I felt guilty most times because I didn't make the imaginary deadline. 
This year, I'm writing when I feel like it. It may be 3 months, or 3 days before my next post because I am intentional about reducing self-induced stress. Everything doesn't have to have a deadline (My new morning affirmation). It's not just the blog either, it's bigger than that. I just turned 40 and I've decided that unlike my 30's where I was in grind mode all of the time, my 40's will be about life first, work second. Life being... self-care, family time, new experiences,  travel, and dare I say...romantic love!