So, I've been thinking a lot lately how we "sistas" don't necessary treat each other like family, but more like enemies, and I just want to know, does it all come down to envy? It's like as long as she has some sort of flaw, overweight,unattractive, uneducated...then she's cool. But curse her if she has it all, a career,beauty,body, great personality,talent, and man, then she's a B**** or she's stuck up, or conceited, or whatever other negative term we can assign her. Think about it, if Tyra Banks looked like Sheryl Underwood (You know, the monkey bread lady from the movie Beauty Shop), then she wouldn't get the slack she does now. I love Tyra, she's beautiful, talented, a hell of a business woman, and she gives back. And I don't even wanna go there with the things I read about about Beyonce. People constantly try discredit her, and wish her failure. I remember when I saw the online video of her falling on stage during her tour, people said, "That's what she gets!" Why, because she knows how to gain world wide appeal and has been a superstar since her teenage years? Or is it because she's drop dead gorgeus even without weave, and a body to kill for? Even her humble attempt to fix what Kanye did to Taylor Swift on the VMA's did not go unmet with negative remarks. For whatever reason she gets labeled an undercover B****, which I just find hard to believe. But hey, I don't know her. I mean, we love Queen Latifah, because she was the heavy set tomboy, we love Oprah because she publicly struggled with her weight, and hasn't been seen as a sex symbol.We love Mary J. because she came from the hood, and Keyshia Cole.But had they been college educated and lived in suburbs, would we feel the same?
I just know that it bothers me that we can't just love and support one other; that we smile in each other's faces, but secretly despise. Instead of looking at each other of inspiration, many Black women look at each other as competition, and it's disheartening.
I'm the type to wish my people well, because success for you, means success for all of us. On the other hand, I've been a victim of what we call, "hatin'" and I couldn't understand because I wasn't even where I wanted to be yet. But it was the energy I felt, the behind my back talk. Craaaazy!
I'm the type to wish my people well, because success for you, means success for all of us. On the other hand, I've been a victim of what we call, "hatin'" and I couldn't understand because I wasn't even where I wanted to be yet. But it was the energy I felt, the behind my back talk. Craaaazy!
It's just like the coffee cup video featured below, you gotta focus on you, not everybody else. And perhaps if we genuinely support and uplift our "sistas", good will come our way.
Recently I 've met a few women who show nothing but love and encouragement, and at first I was distrustful because if you weren't in my circle, I'd think you had ulterior motives. Now I'm slowly learning that just because I got burned by other so called "sistas" doesn't mean I shouldn't open my heart and mind to the possibility of real ones.
Now that I've vented, feel free to follow me and post a comment. Am I wrong? Do you agree or disagree? What are your experiences? Is it just the "sistas" or do other races do it? I wanna know
This is an interesting one. I've been fortunate to have great friends over the years and I haven't had too many "burns" from sistas so I've always wondered what the lack of trust is about. I don't think people love Queen Latifah just because she big. She's beautiful and multitalented. She came from rapping and ladies first to Chicago and Oscar nominations and we shouldn't take away from that because she's plus sized. She's just as dope as Beyonce. But she's also real and approachable and I think that gives her a likeablilty that Beyonce just doesn't have.
ReplyDeleteI love Beyonce as an entertainer but hate to see her in an interview because she just doesn't come across as real to me and she never has anything interesting to say but I still support her.
I get what you're saying but I think when you present it that way you diminish Oprah and Queen Latifah's accomplishments. Oprah's is one of the richest women in America, a pioneer in the media, and Tyra probably wouldn't be doing what half of what she'd doing if Oprah hadn't paved the way. People love her for that, her business savvy, and her talk show. I don't know if it's just because she struggles w/weight.
Overall, I think the more famous you are the more haters you have. Both Oprah and Queen Latifah have their haters too. They both have lesbian rumors floating around about them.
And I know this is really long but I want to give a shout out to sistas. I think we get a bad rap. I know too many supportive and positive sistas to buy into the hype.
udiva
www.curvytalk.com
I'm glad you commented. I definitley don't want to diminish they're accomplishments, as a matter if fact Oprah and Queen are on my role model list because Queen is someone I see in myself, she blossomed into a beautiful talented business woman. And I'm trying to sit on the couch with Oprah one day. They have both been hanging on my wall of inspiration for years. I just think sometimes we feel like, WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER, if she seems to have it all, and we are more accepting when they don't seem to have it all. Like it's not okay to have it all, so how dare any Black woman of color have the audacity to do so?! So I guess what bothers me is that line of thinking. I've heard people say stuff about women I know personally, like ,well she's successful and pretty, but she's fat and doesn't have a man. Or if she's extraordinarily beautiful, she's must be stuck up or shallow, when the she's far from it. It's crazy to me.
ReplyDeleteAnd of course we know you've made it when there are rumors flying, but from looking on the internet, and at gossip websites ( my vice) they seem to fly more viciously at Black Women who are smart as well as beautiful and slim, versus if they are beautiful and dumb (shout out to some of those reality chicks) or if they don't meet the close minded, stereotypical standards of beauty seen on those same websites.
Thanks for commenting.